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Navigating Bedwetting: A Guide to Nighttime Potty Training

Imagine this: you've just fallen into a deep sleep when your child appears at your bedside and wakes you up with the dreaded phrase “I had an accident!” You bid a good night’s sleep goodbye, and get up to clean up your child, change out the bedding, and start yet another load of laundry. The frustration and concern wash over you, and you wonder, "When will this end?" Bedwetting is a common challenge for many children from toddlerhood all the way up through the double digits. It's problematic for various reasons, from the inconvenience of midnight sheet changes to health and cleanliness concerns. Many parents feel lost when it comes to fixing bedwetting. The good news is that sometimes the solutions are easier than you’d think! In this blog post, we'll explore when and how to intervene on bedwetting and I’ll provide you with a roadmap to navigate this (hopefully short) phase. How Do You Know When It's Time to Intervene on Bedwetting? The journey to conquer bedwetting begins with recognizing when the time is right for intervention. Bedwetting is a common occurrence, and every child is different in terms of when they are physically and developmentally ready for dry nights. To [...]

Navigating Bedwetting: A Guide to Nighttime Potty Training2023-11-03T01:23:44+00:00

Things That Go Bump In The Night: Bedtime Fears and Anxiety

In the season of all things spooky, the darkness of the night can often stir up fears and anxiety in both adults and children. It's important to acknowledge that fear and anxiety at bedtime are not uncommon. Studies have shown that almost 75% of children have nighttime fears and anxiety, and more than 40 million adults in the US suffer from anxiety disorders, which often affect sleep. In this post, we'll explore the distinction between specific bedtime fears and general anxiety, talk about how to identify triggers and discover practical strategies to combat bedtime fear and anxiety for both you and your child. Fear vs. Anxiety Before we get to fixing nighttime frights, it's important to distinguish between two similar, but distinct problems: specific bedtime fears and general nighttime anxiety. Nighttime fears often take the form of well-defined, tangible phobias. Think of the classic boogeyman or the fear of the dark, which children commonly experience. These fears have clear, identifiable triggers, and whether rational or not, the person can typically tell you exactly what they are afraid of at night. In contrast, general nighttime anxiety is a broader, less defined sense of unease or nervousness about bedtime and sleep. It may not [...]

Things That Go Bump In The Night: Bedtime Fears and Anxiety2023-10-14T03:11:03+00:00

Must-Read Sleep Books: A Guide to Better Sleep

Sleep is vital for our physical and mental health, but there is so much information out there sometimes it’s hard to know where to start and who to trust. Whether you're a parent dealing with your child's sleep issues or an adult struggling with insomnia, finding the right resources is essential in your sleep journey. In today’s post, we'll explore some must-read sleep books that offer insights and solutions for better sleep. From the science of sleep to bedtime strategies for children and relaxation techniques for adults, these books are some of my current favorites on sleep!   "Why We Sleep" by Matthew Walker If you are a science nerd like me, "Why We Sleep" by Dr. Matthew Walker is a must-read. This book provides a deep dive into the science of sleep, while making the reasearch easy to understand and interesting. Dr. Walker, a world-renowned sleep scientist, takes you on an eye-opening journey through the intricacies of sleep. With his engaging writing style, he explains how sleep impacts our physical and mental health, from memory consolidation to immune system support. This book equips you with the knowledge to appreciate the importance of sleep in a whole new light.   "Goodnight, Sweet [...]

Must-Read Sleep Books: A Guide to Better Sleep2023-09-15T22:30:09+00:00

The Bedtime Pass: A get out of jail free card to solve your bedtime woes

As a parent, you've likely experienced countless nights when bedtime feels more like a never-ending encore of curtain calls, peppered with endless requests and questions from your little ones. The struggle of getting your child to stay in bed and sleep through the night can be a nightmare. If you're nodding your head in agreement, you're not alone. Fortunately, there's a behavior analytic technique that we use in sleep treatment that could bring some peace and quiet back to your evenings – the Bedtime Pass. In this post, we'll explore how the Bedtime Pass works, what the research says about it, and who can benefit the most from using it. What is the Bedtime Pass? Picture this: You've finished the bedtime stories, tucked your child in, and just when you’ve settled in to enjoy a little peace and quiet at the end of the night, you hear tiny footsteps. "I need water." "Can you check under the bed?" "One more story, please?" These bedtime encores can be frustrating and take up the little precious time you have for yourself at night. Even worse, middle-of-the-night wanderings can lead to a sleepless night for everyone. The Bedtime Pass can be an effective solution for [...]

The Bedtime Pass: A get out of jail free card to solve your bedtime woes2023-08-28T20:29:44+00:00

Time-Based Visiting: A gentle approach to independent sleeping

A few posts ago we talked about sleep dependencies and how healthy sleep dependencies can make for a good night’s sleep, while unhealthy sleep dependencies can cause all sorts of problems. One of the most prevalent unhealthy sleep dependencies that I see with children is parent presence. Many children need a parent with them in order to fall asleep, and if the parent manages to sneak out once they fall asleep, they tend to wake back up later in the night and need their parent again. Teaching your child how to fall asleep independently is a tough job, but time-based visiting is a great gentle tactic that can help! In my last blog post, we talked about why the “cry it out” method often fails. Rather than just going cold turkey and hoping you and your child can survive the first few nights, there are some gradual and gentle methods you can try instead. One of my favorites is called time-based visiting. In this method, the caregiver does check-ins and provides brief attention, according to a schedule, regardless of the child’s behavior. I’ve found time-based visiting to be incredibly effective, and reasonably easy for parents to implement, but I think it’s essential [...]

Time-Based Visiting: A gentle approach to independent sleeping2023-08-20T02:17:03+00:00

The “Cry It Out” Method…and Why I Don’t Recommend It

As a parent, you’re probably all too familiar with the challenges of getting your little ones to fall asleep and stay asleep. The bedtime routine can often turn into a bedtime battle, leaving both parents and children exhausted and frustrated. One of the most common sleep problems I see in young children is needing a parent present to fall (or stay) asleep. One regularly suggested solution to this issue is the "cry it out" method (you might also know this as the “Ferber method”). Often this method is synonymous with sleep training. But if you’ve been putting off sleep training because you are worried about having to deal with your child “crying it out,” never fear because there are better ways! In this post, we will explore why the "cry it out" method might not be the best approach and I’ll offer some alternative, gentler strategies that prioritize a more supportive and calm sleep experience for your child. What is the "Cry It Out" Method? The "cry it out" method involves putting your child to bed, leaving the room, and allowing them to cry for a designated period without parental intervention, with the hope that they will learn to self-soothe and eventually [...]

The “Cry It Out” Method…and Why I Don’t Recommend It2023-08-10T22:19:55+00:00

I Don’t Wanna Go To Bed!!

Competing Activities at Bedtime Over the last few weeks, we’ve been looking at the four main causes of most sleep problems and how to fix them.  We’ve talked about how to make sure you are tired at bedtime, setting up regular bedtime routines, and finding healthy sleep dependencies.  The fourth big cause of many sleep problems for both adults and children is competing activities. This one might seem a little too obvious, but sleep isn’t the most fun or exciting thing in the world (especially for kids), so of course, if there are other more fun things to do at bedtime, we are likely to choose fun over sleep. For most adults, we at least recognize the importance of a good night’s sleep and understand the impact of our choices if we don’t get to bed on time, but many children don’t yet have the reasoning and planning skills required to make good decisions at bedtime, which makes choosing fun over sleep all the more tempting. Setting Limits at Bedtime One of the best ways to help your child at bedtime is to set clear and reasonable limits, make sure those limits are transparent, and stick to them. Make sure your child [...]

I Don’t Wanna Go To Bed!!2023-08-01T01:45:12+00:00

Sleep Dependencies: Friend or Foe?

Welcome back! The last few weeks we’ve been talking about the four most common causes of sleep problems and what you can do to fix them. This week we are going to focus on sleep dependencies, a common problem that most people don’t even know exists! Sleep dependencies are anything that someone needs to have with them/around them to fall asleep. Sleep dependencies can be things like a pacifier, a blanket, a stuffed animal, a parent, a cell phone, music, noise, silence, or even TV. There are some sleep dependencies that are healthy because they help you to fall asleep fast and stay asleep, but there are many sleep dependencies that are unhealthy- even though they might help you fall asleep initially, they make you wake up later in the night. What makes a sleep dependency healthy/unhealthy? Sleep dependencies aren’t a bad thing in and of themselves,  so in any sleep treatment, we want to make sure the person has one or two healthy sleep dependencies. But we also have to look out for unhealthy sleep dependencies and when we spot those, we have to figure out how to get rid of them as soon as we can. Healthy sleep dependencies have [...]

Sleep Dependencies: Friend or Foe?2023-07-12T22:16:23+00:00

The Bedtime Routine: Your Key to Fixing Nighttime Chaos

The last few weeks we’ve been talking about the four main causes of sleep problems, and what you can do to fix them. This week we are going to focus on problem #2: chaos and unpredictability before bedtime. Not having a predictable bedtime routine can wreak havoc on sleep for both children and adults, but the good news is that it’s a pretty easy problem to fix! This week we will talk about why bedtime routines are important, and what makes a good bedtime routine.   What is a bedtime routine? Bedtime routines are a set of consistent and predictable activities that lead up to what we call “behavioral quietude,” the brief time when you lay quietly and fall asleep. These routines act as a signal to your brain and body to start getting ready for sleep, helping you transition from wakefulness to slumber. Establishing a predictable bedtime routine helps you wind down and gets melatonin flowing, making you drowsy and helping you fall asleep faster. Last week we discussed how maintaining a regular sleep schedule is crucial for optimizing sleep. Going to bed and waking up at consistent times helps regulate the body's internal clock, aka the circadian rhythm. Combining a [...]

The Bedtime Routine: Your Key to Fixing Nighttime Chaos2023-07-05T15:24:43+00:00

What To Do When You Aren’t Tired At Bedtime

We’ve all been there- you can barely keep your eyes open all day, but then suddenly when it’s time to get ready for bed you are wide awake and feeling wired. Or maybe you’re a parent and you’ve finally finished all the evening chores, baths are done, teeth brushed….and now the kids are bouncing off the walls. Last week we talked about four of the most common causes of sleep problems and reviewed some reasons you or your child might not be sleepy at bedtime, this week let’s talk about how to fix this frustrating sleep problem! A good, healthy sleeper should generally fall asleep within 10-15 minutes of getting into bed, so let’s figure out how to get you there!   Solution 1: Make sure you know how much sleep your child needs As children grow, their sleep needs evolve. You might be surprised to learn that there is actually a very specific amount of sleep that individuals need at different ages, and while there is a small amount of variance within each age group, research has shown that we can predict exactly how much sleep people need at each age to function at their best. It’s important to be aware [...]

What To Do When You Aren’t Tired At Bedtime2023-06-28T04:20:29+00:00
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